


12 Fics of Christmas

by lumosinlove



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Sherlock (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-29
Updated: 2017-12-31
Packaged: 2019-02-23 09:35:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 10,289
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13187334
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lumosinlove/pseuds/lumosinlove
Summary: It's late but I thought I'd start posting these 12 ficlets on here. Hope you enjoy!





	1. On the first day of Christmas...

The common room was ablaze. Fires roared in the grates, exploding snap sizzled in every corner. Sirius watched the scene by one of the large, stained glass windows, feeling the coolness of the snow falling outside against the back of his neck, a relief from the heat of the party within.

“ _Fuck_ yes—“ James stumbled slightly into the center of the room, Lily not far behind him, laughing but supporting him more than he was actually standing. James raised his bottle of butterbeer over his head, glasses sliding down his nose, “It’s _fucking_ Christmas!”

His declaration was met with much too enthusiastic cheers from the room and Sirius laughed, letting out a loud _woop_ and earning a finger point from a very drunk James Potter.

“Hm, well, look who we found here? Waiting like the slut he is,” Sirius heard footsteps stop behind him, “right under the mistletoe.”

Sirius swallowed, lowering his butterbeer from his lips and turning around, “Octavian. Who invited you?”

The taller boy smirked, flashing his straight teeth, his tongue peaking out to wet his lower lip, “You don’t think I belong in this party?”

“I think you’re a snake.”

Octavian stepped forward, “And what do you have against snakes? After all, you’re _bred_ from them. Oh look,” His eyes flickered upward, “Now we’re both under it.”

Sirius narrowed his eyes at him, confused, before following his gaze. There, hung from a wooden beam above them, was a small sprig of mistletoe. Sirius rolled his eyes, “Fuck off.”

“What, you don’t want to kiss me?” Octavian’s hand was suddenly on Sirius’ hip.

Sirius knew that he could have simply pushed Octavian off. He could have not caused a scene that would most definitely be noticed—and encouraged—by their intoxicated onlookers. Instead, he raised his glass, still mostly full, and gracefully proceeded to throw the sugary liquid into Octavian’s perfect hair and teeth. The boy spluttered, his hand retreating to wipe at his eyes.

“Fucking hell, Black!“

“Excuse me.”

Sirius sidestepped him, easily avoiding the mess, and made his way over to Lily and Marlene who were laughing too hard over what they had clearly just witnessed.

“Merlin, Sirius,” Lily leaned into his open side hug, hitting his chest a few times, “That was something out of a muggle film.”

“No one gets that reference, Lily.” Marlene was practically bouncing on her toes, “Do you think it’s overkill if I go over there and do it too?”

“Sirius had a reason to, you can’t do it.”

“Sirius had a reason to do what?”

The three of them looked up at Remus, who had appeared by Sirius’ shoulder, his hand resting gently on his waist, his cheek dropping briefly against Sirius’ temple as a hello.

“Octavian over there was trying to trap Sirius under some mistletoe—I mean, honestly, I think James hung it everywhere _specifically_ for you, Lils.” Marlene rolled her eyes, “Anyway, you missed a great show.”

“A show?” There was an edge to Remus’ voice, and Sirius instantly imagined what he must be thinking they meant by ‘show.’ 

He raised his empty glass, “He’ll smell like caramel for weeks, courtesy of Padfoot.”

“Oh.” He sounded relieved, but Sirius didn’t feel his muscles relax, “Well. Serves him right.”

Marlene let out a little laugh, eyes flicking up and down Remus, “Alright there, Lupin?”

“Fine. Sirius?” Suddenly there was a hand in Sirius’ and he was being tugged away, only just managing to hand Lily his empty glass.

“Re—“ Sirius laughed as he stumbled a bit, “Okay, you have to remember that you are dragging a slightly intoxicated person behind you who may—fuck—“ Sirius narrowly avoiding smashing into a side table with his hip, “may not be the best at maneuvering right now.”

Remus halted, drawing Remus to his chest as they reached the foot of the stairs. Sirius let out a whoosh of breath at the sudden halt and looked up at Remus. His hair was fluffed out around his ears from the eat of the fire, his scars pink like the flush of his cheeks. His hands, for once, weren’t cold against the bare strip of skin beneath Sirius’ jumper.

“Sorry, love.” Remus mumbled, but that was all he said before—more gently—pulling Remus up towards the dormitories.

“Hm, I like this direction.” Sirius laughed as he followed Remus through the door, only to have it cut off as he was pushed against it, causing it to close with a slam, rattling the mirror to their left.

“Fuck.” Sirius mumbled as Remus loomed over him, palms already pressing to his cheeks, “I really like this direction.”

“I’ve always hated that fucker.” Sirius opened his mouth to respond but Remus’ thumb was there, running over his lower lip and making Sirius’ words cut off in a soft gasp, “Mistletoe…Who the hell does he think he is…”

And Sirius felt it, as he always did when Remus got like this. The tingle under his skin, the spike in his blood.

“Fuck.” He mumbled again. His fingers dug into Remus’ sweater and he pulled him closer, smiling, “You don’t have to wait for mistletoe, do you, love?”

“I definitely do not. Think people need to learn that already…” Remus leaned down, pressing a hard kiss to Sirius’ mouth, his arms wrapping fully around his body to pull him away from the wall and closer to his chest.

Sirius leaned forward, pressing onto his toes and looped his arms around Remus’ neck. They stayed like that for a moment, enjoying the silence for the most part, but laughing at the occasional muffled cheering that rose from downstairs.

“Do you recon James is dancing on a table, or something?” Remus said quietly, nose bumping into Sirius’ as he spoke.

“Do you really care?” Sirius pushed his fingers into Remus’ hair, “Can’t we stay here? Octavian is down there…don’t want him getting his hands on me ag—”

“That’s _enough_ —“ Remus laughed, stopping Sirius’ words with a kiss, peppering them against his lips, “Guess I just have to resort to stealing you away up here.”

Sirius grinned up at him, eyes flicking over his face, looking warm even in the dim room, “Guess so.”

Remus’ thumb brushed across his cheekbone, “Where only I can have you.”

“Well,” Sirius pressed another soft kiss to Remus’ mouth, “I think that’s true no matter where we are, don’t you?”


	2. On the second day of Christmas...

“Why in the _world_ would you make this with water?”

Sirius looked up from the pan he was stirring. Remus was leaning over his shoulder, stonily looking from the hot chocolate tin to the stove.

“What?”

Remus huffed a little, setting the box down and sending Sirius a pointed look, “You’re suppose to use milk. Now this is just like…” He made a face, “like chocolate _tea_.”

Sirius snorted, switching the spoon to his left hand so he could wrap his other around Remus’ narrow hips, “But you love tea.”

Remus, despite his glower, leaned into the touch, “Not when its suppose to be hot chocolate.”

Sirius set the spoon down, “You’re the one who asked me to make it, love.”

“ _Yes_ , under the impression that you knew how to make it.” Remus took the spoon, gently hip-bumping Sirius out of the way. Sirius laughed and bumped back before hoisting himself up onto the counter and placing that bag of marshmallows in his lap.

Remus took the brown water over to the sink and carefully dumped it, steam rising up to curl the ends of his hair. Sirius watched quietly, admiring how he looked in his striped pajamas, red and white for the holidays.

“Don’t tell me your mum made it with water. That’s a crime against nature.” Remus opened the fridge and got out the milk, pouring a generous amount into the already heated pan.

Sirius scoffed, “You’re assuming my mum made hot chocolate.” He held a marshmallow out, “Open.”

“Oh.” Remus smirked at him before letting Sirius place the marshmallow in his mouth, “Right. Well, either way I’m about to make you reevaluate everything you know.”

Sirius smiled, leaning back on the heels of his palms, “Is that so? All that just because of a little milk?”

“Milk,” Remus reached up and opened a cupboard, shaking a small vial at Sirius, “and peppermint.”

Sirius hummed, sitting quietly while Remus measured out the mix, then laughed when Remus proceeded to shrug and dump a few extra spoonfuls in.

“Like chocolate, do we?”

Remus sent him a soft smile as he added a few drops of the peppermint extract, “A bit.”

Sirius grinned, “God.”

Remus raised an eyebrow, eyes focused on stirring, “You don’t like peppermint?”

“No.” Sirius shook his head, “I mean yes. I was just—you’re cute. You’re just…” Sirius shrugged, laughing softly, “I don’t know, _Christmassy._ ”

Remus looked up, spoon halting in its motion. His eyes seemed to flit around Sirius’ face for a moment, taking in the large jumper and the marshmallow bag and the flush of his cheeks and the thick curls of his hair that looked darker against the white snow falling outside the kitchen window. The only thing that eventually broke the silence was the sound of bubbling chocolate and Remus flicked off the stove, silencing it. He let the spoon rest against the edge of the pan with a dull pang and nestled himself between Sirius’ knees, marshmallows squishing between them.

“I’m Christmassy?”

“Mhm.” Sirius tilted his chin forward, a silent hope for a kiss, “Peppermint and all.”

Remus smiled, pressing a kiss to Sirius’ cheek, then the corner of his mouth, then another to his lips, “You look pretty Christmassy yourself.”

Sirius narrowed his eyes, smile still playing at his lips, “I told you I would wear the pajamas as long as there were no jokes.”

Remus laughed, “I wasn’t joking though. You’re practically a Christmas miracle.”

“ _Remus_ —“

But Remus silenced him with another kiss, smiling against his lips, “Get two mugs down, will you? The chocolate’s ready.”


	3. On the third day of Christmas...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Remus has the flu and Sirius takes care of him.

Sirius huffed as he gave the bottom of their front door the extra shove it needed to close, shutting out the drafty hallway.

“God, it’s freezing out there. Do you see the snow, babe? Fucking insane. I can’t feel my fucking ears.”

Sirius shivered as he unwrapped his scarf and shrugged out of his jacket. He craned his neck to look into the living room as he hung it on the coatrack, “Re?” He toed his boots off, laughing a little, “Are you home right now, or am I talking to myself?”

There was another beat of silence before a very weak, “‘m here…” came from the living room. Sirius looked up sharply from where he was pushing his shoes against the wall.

“Re—“ Sirius rounded the corner into the living room and came up short, heart contracting in his chest. He couldn’t help the soft smile that came over his face, “Sweetheart.”

Remus, from the positive mound of blankets he was in on the couch, seemed to be trying to frown at Sirius, but his face only seemed to be able to blink sleepily, cheeks flushed and nose beaded with sweat, “’s not funny.”

Sirius shook his head, quickly padding across the room. He knelt next to the couch, “Love, I don’t think it’s funny.” He said softly, tugging the blankets higher around Remus’ chin, “Flu?”

Remus just closed his eyes in response.

“Aw, baby…” Sirius reached forward and pushed Remus’ sweaty fringe from his forehead, “Jesus, you’re burning up.” Remus made a soft sound in his throat and pushed his head gently into Sirius’ cold fingers, nestling his cheek into them as they slid to cradle his jaw, “I’m gonna get you some water, okay? Do you want anything else? Soup? Hot Chocolate?”

Remus, eyes still closed, took a beat before responding, voice horse, “You have no idea how to make hot chocolate.”

Sirius grinned, leaning forward and pressing a soft kiss to Remus’ forehead, “Knew that would get you talking.”

“Tea, maybe.” Remus’ hands tightened on Sirius’ wrist when he went to get up, “Wait.”

Sirius looked over Remus’ sleepy face, relaxed and tired, “Yeah, love?”

Remus put his palm over the back of Sirius’ hand on his cheek, “’s nice and cold.”

Sirius brushed his thumb softly over the high of Remus’ cheekbone, “I’ll bring some cool wash cloths, how about that? I’ll spoon feed you tea and make sure your cool enough and,” Sirius pressed another few kisses in a row to Remus’ hot forehead, “shower you in kisses, all while watching Christmas films. Sound alright?”

Remus’ eyes cracked open a little, glassy with sleep. He smiled, “You’re my favorite.”

Sirius grinned, “I’ll be right back."


	4. On the fourth day of Christmas...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John and Sherlock's first Christmas together.

“A watch.”

John closed his eyes, lips pressed together, “Sherlock.”

“It’s too rectangular to be cufflinks of any sort, they don’t need that much space, but a watch, a watch box needs to display both the face and the band, doesn’t it, that means a rectangular box, it’s a watch.” He popped the ‘ch’ sound, hands coming to rest clasped behind his back as he stood behind John, who was sat on the sofa. They had pulled it between their chairs, closer to the fire for maximum seating.

“Well, Happy Christmas, Greg. Molly,” John let out a sigh, “Sorry about the surprise. We’re not very good about subtlety around here, apparently. Even when it isn’t our gift to begin with.”

John could practically feel the eye roll that came from behind him. Or at least he thought he could, until, “Please, John, we were subtle enough for years—“

“Then I’m sure we could hand some bloody Christmas presents,” John half turned, raising an eyebrow pointedly, “Hm?”

Sherlock just spun away, moving around the furniture to stand in front of the fire place, looking into the flames.

“Um. John?”

John jumped a little, sloshing his cider in his cup at Molly’s voice. He had been studying Sherlock’s dark, slender form, and blatantly ignoring Molly’s outstretched parcel.

“This one’s for you.” She offered a nervous smile, eyes—perhaps unconsciously—glancing every few moments over to Sherlock, “I hope you like it.”

“Thanks Mols,” John flashed her a grin, setting his drink down, “I’m sure I—“

“You won’t.”

John closed his eyes, sucking a breath through his nose, “…will.”

Sherlock turned on his heels, “You don’t like plaid. Nor the half off stuff.”

“How,” John felt the wrapping paper crinkle in his tightening fist, “could you _possibly know—“_

“There’s a tear in the wrapping paper, all the edges are barely holding on. It was hastily wrapped which usually corresponds to hastily bought, there’s your half off. Molly here clearly didn’t know what to get you and went to the shops this morning last minute, desperate. Good thing she found this jumper, and oh look,” Sherlock tore off a bit of the wrapping paper, rubbing it for a moment between his thumb and forefinger before tossing it into the flames, “The patterns nearly match, how sweet. It really is a shame you don’t like plaid.”

“I do-“ John rested a comforting hand on Molly’s knees, “I do like plaid, he’s just… being himself.”

Molly sent him a smile, “It’s okay. There’s a gift receipt in there.” She took a nervous sip of wine, “He’s right anyway you—You’re a bit hard to shop for.” She finished the words with a laugh, lips working nervously to try and ease the tension.

“You can say that again.” Greg shook his head into his whiskey glass, “John, don’t you have any hobbies you could let us know about, other than Sherlock?”

“Sherlock’s not a hobby.”

“Aren’t I enough?”

Sherlock and John looked at each other, John rolling his eyes at the smirk plastered across his boyfriend’s face.

“I… I like to cook. There, how’s that?”

“Well, yes, that _would_ have been very helpful.” Greg tossed John a poorly wrapped, rather soft, package, “There’s your sweater.”

Sherlock chuckled lowly, “Apparently your hobby is jumper wearing, John.”

“And your’s is spoiling Christmas, is it?”

“Don’t speak so soon.”

John blinked as Sherlock fixed him under a pinning gaze, eyes crinkling just a little at the corners before he raised his glass of cider to his lips and turned away to the fireplace, leaving John’s chest warm and nervous.

John cleared his throat, “More drinks?”

~

John shut the door with one last wave to Molly and Greg’s taxi and let out a long sigh, trudging up the stairs with slow, thudding steps. He loved Christmas, he did, but it was exhausting.

“You’ve never liked the holidays.”

John looked up at Sherlock who had taken his suit jacket off and was stirring a fresh cup of tea.

John laughed a little, collapsing into a chair, “You used to refuse to even call them holidays.”

“Consumerism, John. That’s what all this really is—“

“ _Sherlock._ ” John pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Except with you.”

John blinked, looking up. Sherlock had set his tea down, and instead in his hand now was a thin envelope, “Sherlock?”

Sherlock’s lips were pressed together, turning the envelope over in his fingers. He wouldn’t quite meet John’s eyes, “There have been many things that have brought you to me, John. Many of them have been…” Sherlock glanced up, then back to the envelope which looked elegant against his slender fingers, “horrific. It pains me every time I remember that I myself have been the source of too many of those times.”

John felt sightly speechless, “It doesn’t—“

“It does matter.” Sherlock looked at him, jaw set but eyes soft, “It does, but that isn’t—that isn’t it right now. Right now, all I’m trying to tell you is that you lost many things. I know you have. But… I like to think that you found some of them again too, along the way.”

John stood, taking a step forward, “I have. You know I have.”

Sherlock looked down at him with the little smile that only seemed to appear for John, then glanced down at the envelope, “Well. I hope this is another one.”

John took the envelope from Sherlock, sending him a soft smile before flicking the flap up and pulling a piece of paper out. Not a piece of paper, a photograph.

John’s heart seized immediately. He breathed in sharply through his nose, trying to catch his breath, and stared and stared.

“Sherlock, where…” He touched the photograph with his fingers, looking up at Sherlock and then back to the picture, “where did you find this?” His voice came out a whisper.

“I didn’t. It was sent here, to 221B. I happened to open it—“

“As you do with packages.” John laughed and cleared his throat when it came out watery.

“The letter said you had carried it while you were in Iraq, that it must have fallen—“

“I thought I lost it in the field.”

“You did. They just…” Sherlock gestured towards the picture, “found it.”

“After so long…”

Sherlock glanced up at him in a way that, if it had been anyone else, John would have called it nerves, “I can ask them to look in on it—“

“No.” John shook his head, “No, I…” He brushed his thumb over the image. Him and his mates, uniforms dusty and helmets on, grinning. Some were gone now, some he’d lost touch with. He should reach out, he really should. “It was something of a good luck charm…Sherlock…”

“John.” Sherlock answered immediately, his hands knotted behind his back.

John looked up at him, and pulled him fiercely into a hug, nose against the lapel of his jacket, “Thank you…Thank you, love.”

It was for so much more than the picture.

Slowly, John felt Sherlock’s arms circle him in return, strong and steady. He felt Sherlock’ head dip, his breath brush his neck, “Happy Christmas, John.”


	5. On the fifth day of Christmas...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Baby please come home...

Remus wasn’t sure when it had gone wrong. Sometime between the sun and the snow, between school starting and school ending, they’d lost their way. It had stopped, the happiness the expanded his chest, and gave way to some weighted sadness, some dread about an unnamed something that had, at some time, gone wrong.

Remus slid the sliding balcony door closed behind him and stepped out onto their balcony. It was feeling more and more like his balcony. Sirius was staying with James and Lily. He had yet to take anything out of the apartment though, so, really, it was like a cruel illusion. Or a game on the back of a cereal box: Two pictures beside each other. Spot the difference.

Remus blinked upward through the snow, pulling his jacket tighter around him and thinking about how, if he had to guess, Sirius had already picked his smoking back up. He was stressed, its what he did when Remus wasn’t around. 

It look strange this way, the snow, like it was all falling around him from a single point. Like each flake was attached to a single string, all being strung to fall to the ground in a tangle like a pearly necklace. It was the small, cold kind that meant it wasn’t warm enough to be fluffy and Christmas-like yet. Remus let it sting his face.

A siren whirled by from below and he looked down. The streets were mostly empty but that wasn’t odd. It was Christmas Eve. It was four in the morning. Technically, it was Christmas. Shame, to hear a siren on Christmas. An emergency that the world was alerted to but would never know the outcome of. Remus wondered what the world would think of his emergency, if he could even call it that.

_Boy Alone And In Love. His Chest Hurts Terribly And The Cure Is Three Blocks Over Doing God Knows What. Will He Be Saved In Time?_

Not that he needed saving, but it would be nice.

Remus closed his eyes, boots crunching as he stepped to lean against the railing, elbows instantly dropping ten degrees. His chest ached, constantly. Everything was gone, everything, and that hurt. But Everything’s toothbrush was still beside his, and his towel was hanging on the bathroom door and his mug was in the cupboard and his side of the bed was empty—

And it’s really all just very cruel.

He rubbed his fingers together, trying to get some of the snow off of them, before shoving them in his pockets. His left hit warm fleece, his right, his phone. He stilled, flipping it around in his palm a few times.

It was four in the morning on Christmas. Surely, stupidity didn’t count on Christmas. If he could just hear his voice… He could hang up after ‘hello.’ He could hear his voice and then resign himself to another night in a cold bed, dreading the morning. Just one moment…

Remus took the phone out of his pocket.

When Sirius picked up, he didn’t say anything. Not even ‘hello.’ He just was there on the other end of the line, three blocks away. Remus cursed himself for loving it so much.

Remus stayed quiet too, for a moment, trying to decide what to say. He sucked in freezing air between his teeth and let snow gather in his hair.

“I—“ He started. He started so many different sentences in his head. Choose one, “I’m wearing your coat.”

Remus closed his eyes. Stupidity doesn’t count on Christmas, he told himself.

Another few beats, “I’m wearing your socks.”

“That’s rude, I never said you could wear my socks.”

Sirius’ reply was quick this time, “I never said you could wear my coat.”

Remus bowed his head, “You left it here, on the property I live on. I have a right. You, on the other hand, _took_ my socks to an unknown destination. If that isn’t stealing, I’m not sure what is.”

“I assure you,” Sirius took a breath, “They’re safe and serving a good cause.”

“Good.” Remus clenched his teeth, fingers curling around the snowy railing, “I don’t care.”

A stretch of silence followed, and Remus watched snow build up on his knuckles.

“It’s quite late.” Sirius’ voice came quietly through the speaker, “The storm’s suppose to get pretty bad, are you home?”

Remus sighed, “I dunno, am I?”

The phone crackled with Sirius’ breath, “What’s that suppose to mean? Yes, Remus.” Remus heard a rustle like Sirius was shifting, or maybe laying down, “You’re the one who’s home.”

Remus scoffed, “Really.”

“Yes, really.” Sirius let out a breath, “Why’re you laughing?”

“I…” Remus let out another small laugh. It didn’t sound humorous, “‘m not laughing, I…” He drew his bottom lip between his teeth, “It’s just a building, Sirius. It’s just a place. It’s not really home anyway, not now that—“

Remus pressed his lips together and looked back up, up and up, at the snow. It was all falling from one point and he was falling with it, from one point, from when Sirius had walked out that door and not come back.

_Why didn’t you come back?_

“Not now that what?” Sirius’ voice was a whisper. Remus shook his head, closed his eyes against the flakes and pressed a hand over them.

“Nothing.”

“No,” Another rustle, like Sirius was standing up, “No, Remus, don’t do that. Tell me.”

Remus dug his thumbs into the threat of tears, “Tell you what?”

A stretch of silence, long and tedious. Remus tried to control his breathing, but he blinked and the first tears rolled down, hot against his cheeks. Sirius’ end of the phone was silent, until—

“Tell me you want me to come home.”

And Remus broke because he could hear it, he could hear that Sirius was crying, and he let out a sob into the speaker.

“Re—“ Another rustle, like Sirius was pressing the phone against his ear, “Please—“

“Come home. Come home.” Remus inhaled shakily, hand gripping the railing, gripping the phone, “Baby…”

“I’m coming. I’m coming right now, okay?” Sirius sniffed, laughing a little, “God, don’t move.”

Remus shook his head, whipping at his cheek as the phone clicked off.

He stood there, frozen and light, blinking against the snow. It was falling in thick flakes now, sticking to everything in sight. His chest rose and fell rapidly, like he was suddenly breathing again, like a smog and been removed from his lungs. How did they do that? With every fight, every rough spot. It was like a magnet, a magnet, or a force that wouldn’t let the bad things stick. It was always quick and when Remus expected to be alone for there rest of time. A phone call, or a run in. Slow conversation and suddenly they were kissing, and Remus could _breathe._

He blinked, letting out a laugh, and turned, yanking the door open and shutting out the snow. He was pulling his scarf off when he froze at the sound of a key in the door.

“Fuck.” Remus’ heart jumped, and he tossed his scarf to the couch, swallowing thickly as the thought of who was about to step through that door for the first time in weeks caused tears to welled up.

The door swung open at the same moment that Remus walked forward, and Remus caught it in his hand, Sirius blinking in surprise at how close he was.

“Fuck…” Remus said again, “That was…” Remus’ breath caught as Sirius’ fingers caught his cheeks, thumbs running over the high of his cheekbones, “…fast.”

Sirius let out a long breath and Remus took in his pink cheeks, his snow-soaked sweatshirt, and snow filled hair, “I ran.”

And Sirius was kissing him, hard and needy, kicking the door closed behind him and pulling Remus against his chest.

“Fuck. You’re freezing, Re.” Sirius’ hands moved over his coat, some left over snow falling to the floor. His lips slid from his mouth to his frostbitten cheeks, “What were you doing?”

“I was on the balcony.” Remus’ hands gripping Sirius’ sweatshirt and pulled up, Sirius’ arms raising to let him pull the wet cloth over his head and reveal the dry, warm, long sleeve shirt beneath. Remus pressed his palms to Sirius’ chest, dizzy with how close he was, dizzy with need. Sirius caught his jaw with his fingertips, leaning backwards some.

“God, you’re insane. Do you know how cold it is?”

Remus leaned into the touch, brows knit, and searched Sirius’ face, his eyes light gray from the snow, “It was better than being in here. I—“ He stuttered, “I can’t stand being here without you.”

Sirius’ eyes softened, head tilting a little. He pressed a tender kiss to Remus’ mouth, then another and another until they were kissing again, clutching at each other and breathing into each other’s mouths. Sirius’ hands pressed Remus’ coat from his shoulders until it fell in a heap to the floor. Remus pushed his fingers through Sirius’ hair and let out a soft, involuntary sound. Sirius just pulled him closer, trying to kiss the worry away until they had to break for air.

“Sirius—“

“We’ll have to talk about it. I know.” Sirius leaned their foreheads together, “I know, and we will. Just not tonight. Not _today_.” They both smiled a little at that, “Christmas Day.”

Remus nodded, “Don’t think we’ll ever beat this present.”

Sirius laughed, pressing a short kiss to Remus’ lips, “No, I don’t think so.” Another kiss, like Sirius just couldn’t help himself, “Don’t think I won’t try though.”

Remus smiled, leaning in to Sirius’ chest for a moment before looking back up into his face.

“I might succeed, you know… I have years of attempts ahead of me.” Sirius frowned a little, worried, “Yeah?”

Remus bit his bottom lip, eyes stinging a little, but he smiled, pushing Sirius’ snow-damp hair out of his eyes, “Yeah. Yeah, love.”


	6. On the sixth day of Christmas...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sirius gives Remus a present.

Remus jumped when two warm hands covered his eyes. His shoulders rose up to his ears and a smile broke out on his face.

“Guess who.” He felt lips against his neck as a very gentle kiss was placed just above his pulse point.

“Well,” Remus tilted his head back a bit, blindly placing the old receipt he was using to mark his place back into his book, “there’s really only one person I’d be okay with kissing my neck, so I hope I’m not wrong in my singular guess.”

“Well.” Sirius’ lips trailed against his skin, “You probably aren’t. But that doesn’t mean you can open your eyes yet, okay?”

Remus laughed, “Wh—“

“ _Okay?_ ”

Remus raised his hands in surrender, “Alright, fine.”

Sirius’ hands released their pressure some, “Promise?”

“My promise runs out in about ten seconds if you don’t tell me—“

Remus kept his eyes closed when Sirius released him. He heard the rustle of fabric as he lightly jumped over the back of the couch. He slid towards Sirius as he fell into the cushions next to him. There was a momentary rustle of paper until it stopped abruptly.

“You’re not looking are you?”

Remus gestured to his face, “You’re not the one with your eyes closed, can’t you see?”

“Right. Right, okay.”

Remus sat their for a few moments while the paper rustling continued, fingers finding Sirius’ knee to drum on idly, before Sirius let out a decisive sigh.

“Okay.”

“Okay…I can open my eyes?”

Sirius laughed, “Okay, you can open your eyes.”

Remus blinked against the blinding snow light coming through their window for a moment, until his eyes focused on Sirius, a grinning Sirius, eyes ablaze, with mouse ears perched on his head and two golden, shiny tickets in his hand.

Remus open and closed his mouth a few times. He brought his hand up to cover it, then suddenly folded his legs beneath him and sat up, eyes flicking from Sirius’ ears to his face.

“What? No—What?” Remus pressed his hands to Sirius’ shoulders, staring at the tickets, “ _What?_ ”

Sirius grinned, laughing as he spoke, “What do you think, love?”

Remus’ hands slid from Sirius’ shoulders to his cheeks, thumbs fingering the thin strap below Sirius’ chin, “No _fucking—really_?”

Sirius let the tickets flutter to the couch and pulled Remus towards him, “We’re spending Christmas in Disneyland, baby.”

Remus half laughed, half kissed Sirius, pulling their mouths together messily, “Fuck, I love you.” He kissed Sirius again, peppering them against his mouth, “I love you, I love you those mouse ears, I love you _in_ those mouse ears. _Fuck_.”

Sirius snickered against Remus’ mouth, hand cupping the back of his head to kiss him deeper, “Well, you’re gonna get five whole days of me in them.” He nipped at Remus’ lower lip, “What’re you gonna do about it?”


	7. On the seventh day of Christmas...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sirius and Remus at Hogwarts, waiting to catch the house elves bringing in the presents. It's their fifth year, and they have yet to catch them.

“C’mon, Moony, don’t fall asleep yet.”

Remus opened one eye, glancing at Sirius, his face just as ablaze as the crackling fire, “‘m not.”

“You’re _eyes_ are closed.”

“It’s two in the _morning_.”

Sirius put another cookie between his teeth before pushing up from the ground and joining Remus on the couch, throwing a leg over his hips. Remus made an ‘oof’ sound but didn’t open his eyes.

“hn hoh!”

Remus raised his eyebrows, “Pardon me?”

There was a crunching sound, “Come on! Please?”

“Pads. Love,” Remus opened his eyes, hands smoothing down Sirius’ sides, “We _never_ catch them. We look every year—“

“No, _no_ —“ Sirius grinned as Remus still tried to talk over him, catching Sirius’ hands as they tried to cover his mouth.

“—and we never do it—“ Remus laughed too as Sirius persisted in trying to stop his words.

Finally, Sirius just leaned forward, pressing a hard kiss to Remus’ mouth and squeezing his hands, locking their fingers together. Remus made a humming sound, relaxing into the cushions. 

Sirius pulled away with one last peck, “We’re gonna do it this year. We’re gonna catch them.”

“See,” Remus tilted his head up, raising an eyebrow, “This obsession made sense when you were eleven, but now…”

“I just wanna see what they do.” Sirius pressed his hands to Remus’ cheeks, his voice an excited whisper, “I want to see if they really eat the cookies.”

Remus smiled softly, turning his face a little to press a kiss to Sirius’ palm, “Well, right now you’re eating the cookies. But, I love you.”

Sirius shook his head, thumb stroking over Remus’ cheeks, “Merlin, you’re such a smart ass.” He pressed a quick kiss to Remus’ lips, “You’re a freckled little smart ass and I love you.” Sirius kissed him slowly, murmuring the words against his lips.

Remus smiled into the kisses, “Is this what you call watching?”

Sirius grabbed two fistfuls of Remus’ shirt and pulled him forward, straight on top of him.

Remus laughed, “Okay, you might fit on this couch horizontally but _I_ certainly don’t—“

“Kiss me, Lupin.”

Remus looked down at Sirius, his face bathed in firelight, hair splayed across the couch cushions. He bit his lip, smiling gently and leaning in.

When Sirius woke up the next morning, his head on Remus’ chest, there was a pile of presents beneath the tree and he hadn’t a clue how they got there.

Remus pressed a soft kiss to his cheek, “Next year, love.”


	8. On the eighth day of Christmas...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A wolfstar Christmas proposal...

“Your turn, love.”

Remus looked up from his place next to the Christmas tree, his eyes widening at the large box that Sirius held, barely able to fit between his arms.

“What the—I already opened my gift!”

Sirius set the box down in front of Remus with a huff, grinning, “And now you’re going to open your second one.”

“ _Sirius_.”

“Last one.” Sirius held his hands up, “I promise.”

“I—I only got you—“

“Re.” Sirius leaned over the box to press a soft kiss to Remus’ mouth, “It’s okay. I just love you and I…” Sirius quieted, looking at Remus’ surprised, softly smiling face. He smiled too, “I just love you.” Another kiss, “Open.”

Remus tilted his chin forward into kiss, biting his lower lip, “Okay. Alright, alright.” Remus shook his head, laughing a little, “You’re ridiculous.”

Sirius just stayed silent, eyes flicking from Remus’ face to the box as he opened the lid.

Remus laughed a little, raising an eyebrow at Sirius, “Another box.”

Sirius just smiled and shrugged.

Remus narrowed his eyes playfully and pulled off the lid. A laugh bubbled up again, “ _Another_ box.”

Sirius pulled his knees into his chest, silently keeping count, “Guess so.”

Remus nodded slowly, “Alright…” He lifted the lid and shot Sirius a look, “Pads.”

“Open your present, Moony.”

“I have been. For twenty minutes.”

Sirius picked up his hot chocolate, shrugging again, “I’ll ignore that exaggeration and tell you to keep opening.”

Remus laughed, “Pass me a marshmallow, then. I’m gonna need stamina, it seems.”

Sirius rolled his eyes but complied, hoping Remus couldn’t see his hand shaking.

Remus had pulled off four more lids before he stopped again.

“ _Seven._ ”

“Seven. And getting smaller, if you noticed, so if you’d just…” Sirius bit his lip, nodding towards the box.

Remus laughed, pulling off another lid, “I guess I have to give you credit for being creative.”

Sirius let out a shaky breathe, eyeing the smallest box that Remus was picking up, “I hope so…”

Remus looked up, “Hmm?”

Sirius shook his head, hearing his heart pound in his ears, “Nothing, nothing.”

Remus snorted, “Watch me open this one and there’s just nothing in here and this was all just one of your—“

But his voice died. He had opened the box. Remus stared, silent, blinking down at the small, silver ring nestled inside.

“pranks…” He finished weakly. His hand came up and pressed against his chest, as if trying to calm his heart. Sirius knew the feeling. Remus shook his head, and when he blinked again, a tear fell down his cheek, “Please tell me this isn’t a prank.”

Sirius laughed, his own watery as well and reached forward, gently taking the box from Remus’ shaking fingers and into his own, “No, love. This isn’t a prank.” Sirius sniffed, wiping at his own cheek with his sleeve, “Okay. Shit, am I even going to be able to talk?”

Remus’ hand went to his throat as he laughed, obviously feeling the same lump of emotion that Sirius was.

Sirius cleared his throat, “I’ll have to try, I guess.” Taking the ring out of the box, Sirius shifted until he was kneeling on one knee, eyes only slightly higher than Remus’.

“I mean, honestly, you probably know everything I’m about to tell you, anything I ever could tell you, about how much I love you. At least, I hope you do…”

Remus nodded, hands now gripping the edge of one of the larger boxes.

Sirius took one of those hands, “But I do, Re. I love you so much and it fucking… _amazes_ me because every day I just seem to love you more than the last, even when I think that’s impossible because I love you…so fucking much.”

Remus made a soft sound in his throat and pushed the boxes out of the way to reach Sirius, seeming to be unable to help himself, and fell nearly into his lap, palms pressed to his cheeks, “Sirius—“

“You gotta let me finish.” Sirius laughed as Remus did, head falling into Sirius’ neck briefly, cheeks wet.

“Sorry. Sorry, sorry…” Remus met Sirius’ eyes, lip between his teeth, waiting.

Sirius laughed softer this time, wrapping his arms around Remus’ waist and pulling him to his chest, “Baby…” He bumped their noses together.

Remus burst, “God, you are so slow, let me say _yes_ already—“

Sirius laughed, heart melting at the answer, although he knew it already, “So impatient. Marry me, will you?”

“ _Yes_.” Remus grinned, pressing their lips together, “Yes, yes…” the rest of his words got lost into Sirius’ mouth.

“Merry Christmas, love.” Sirius murmured, fingers tangling in Remus’ hair.

Remus’ fingers splayed against Sirius’ cheek, cradling his jaw, “Merry Christmas.” Remus grinned, “ _Fiancée._ ”

Sirius laughed, “God. Never gonna get tired of that.”

Remus kissed him again, and they fell among the wrapping and Christmas lights, snow falling outside.


	9. On the ninth day of Christmas...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A Jeddy Christmas...

It was a Potter-Weasley Christmas, of course there was fighting. Banter, more like. This year, upon Gramp Weasley’s request, they were playing a rather peculiar game called _Scrabble_ —a game that was far too much like schoolwork for James’ liking. 

“Hey. Hey.” Everyone looked up at Teddy, who was pointing aggressively at the word Lily had just put down, “This is a _muggle_ game. You can’t use wizard words. Nope, _lumos_ is out. No double word score for you, Potter.”

Lily scoffed, “Says _who_?”

“Says…” Teddy paused for a second before picking up the box lid, “The box.”

Lily narrowed her eyes, “Give it here, let me see—“

“No.” Teddy threw it behind his head and it collided with his mum’s desk, knocking a quill over.

“ _Teddy._ ” James’ mum scolded, red hair falling out around her face, “You’re just as bad as James, honestly.”

James smiled at that and his eyes met Teddy’s across the coffee table. They grinned at each other for a moment and, without looking away from James, Teddy turned his head towards Ginny.

“Actually, Gin, I think it’d make more sense to say he’s just as bad as _me_.”

“Please, please,” Arthur waved his hands before falling pensive and leaning towards his Hermione who had opted to team up with Ron, “Hermione, dear, do you reckon this is how you spell—“

“Cheating again, Dad.” Ron minutely shifted their letters away from his father.

“Oh, fine, fine.” Arthur squinted at his batch of letters.

James had the mind to laugh lightly with the rest of the family at this exchange, but just barely as Teddy had yet to release his gaze. James leaned forward, feeling heavy with it, and proceeded to spill his row of letters in every which direction.

“Typical.” James caught Lily’s eye roll from the corner of his vision, but he was already standing, narrowing his eyes at Teddy’s smirk.

“Sorry, carry on without me. I’m thirsty.”

James pushed up from the table, swiping his glass and shooting Teddy what he hoped was a subtle but meaningful look. He walked into the kitchen, going to the sink and setting his cup down, turning the tap on for a few moments and then shutting it off. Mere seconds after the water had stopped running there were hands on his waist that were spinning him around.

Teddy grinned down at him, “Hi there.”

James’ palms found his chest, feeling the scratchy wool that Grams seemed to prefer for her holiday sweater making. He ran his hands over it for a moment, feeling the warmth of Teddy’s chest, then looked up into his face, “Mum still thinks you’re a lunatic. Even after all these years.”

Teddy laughed quietly, “Sure. But didn’t you hear her? She think’s you’re _more_ of a lunatic.”

James rolled his eyes, grinning, “You’re ridiculous.” He pressed a lingering kiss to Teddy’s mouth, melting against his chest as Teddy’s hand came up to cup the back of his head. He swallowed back a soft sound, “God, it really has been too long since we’ve been alone.”

Teddy hummed pressing another kiss to James’ mouth, “I blame Christmas.”

James laugh, the sound getting cut off as he allowed himself to be kissed for a few more moments before he slipped out from between the sink and Teddy’s body. With a short kiss to the corner of Teddy’s mouth, he started making his way towards the door, “We should get back. They’ll think we’re _canoodling_ in here.”

Teddy, however, once again got ahold of James’ hips causing James to let out a much too loud laugh. Teddy smiled at the sound, “We can’t _canoodle_ in here? They’d probably prefer it than if we did it out there.”

“T…” James laughed, shaking his head.

Teddy took a step forward causing James to take a step back, “Two minutes.” He said under his breath.

James felt his heart beat pick up in his chest, and he bit his lip, resolve softening, “It’s been two minutes…”

Teddy took another step causing James to nearly stumble backwards, “Two more minutes, then.”

Another step forward, another step back. James’ back hit the kitchen wall, making the clock rattle above them, “Well, now they’re definitely going to talk…”

“What they can’t see,” Teddy’s hands cradled James’ cheeks, “won’t hurt them.”

James bit back a smile, “I swear to God, Theodore. I won’t kiss you for a week if Grams walks in here right now.”

“Hm.” Teddy shrugged one shoulder, thumbs brushing against James’ cheekbones, “Rotten luck on you then because—oh, how did that get there?” Teddy pointedly looked upwards above them to where, as James followed his gaze, he found a small sprig of mistletoe had appeared.

James let out another laugh, “Yeah, real mystery.” He pushed his fingers into Teddy’s hair, heart warming at the light shoots of blue that ran through it at his touch, “C’mere.” James pressed their mouths back together, “You lunatic…”


	10. On the tenth day of Christmas...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “We were playing in the snow and you suddenly tackled me to the ground and now…we’re just…staring…at each other…”— wolfstar

Remus let out a _oof_ as his back hit the thick blanket of snow, Sirius letting out a similar sound as his chest fell against Remus’.

Remus let out a breathless laugh, “Merlin. Lost your footing there, did you?”

Sirius groaned, pushing himself up on his elbows, “Meant to throw that snowball at you but…” Sirius trailed off, blinking down at Remus.

Remus stared back up at him, mouth running dry, “But you fell.”  
Sirius just blinked at him, nodding minutely. They stayed there, frozen, snow falling down around them. Remus followed Sirius’ eyes as they flickered about his face. He couldn’t even feel the cold snow seeping into his coat and sweater under that gaze.

“What?” He whispered.

Sirius shook his head, “Nothing, I…” Remus blinked at him, waiting to see what he would say. Sirius licked his lips, shaking his head again, “How’d your eyes get to be that color? That’s like…” Sirius reached out, leaning to one elbow. Remus closed his eyes and he felt Sirius’ thumb brush just under them, then gently over his eyelid, then lower, against his bottom lip. His fingers were icy cold, “Unreal…”

Remus let out a small laugh, more like a cough, “I… dunno, I…” Remus let out another nervous laugh, “God. What a hopeless flirt I am.”

Sirius’ thumb was still lightly stroking Remus’ jaw, “Y’don’t need to flirt with me, Re. No need to win me over if I’m already yours, right?”

Remus bit his lip, heart thrumming against his ribs, “Pads.” He reached up, fingers curling into his snow-crusted hair, “Love.”

Sirius smiled softly, pressing a kiss to Remus’ mouth, “Could stay here all night…”

Remus hummed, “Well. You aren’t the one encased in snow.”

“Shit.” Sirius laughed, instantly scrambling up, pulling Remus with him, “C’mere, c’mere.”

Remus laughed, stumbling to his feet with the help of Sirius’ hand. He was pulled against a warm chest, and Sirius’ lips pressed to his forehead, “Hot cocoa sound okay?”

Remus nodded, letting Sirius tuck him against his side as they started to trudge their way back up to the castle,” You think they’ll bring it up to us? It is Christmas, after all.”

“Of course.” Sirius grinned, “No one can resist my charm, not even house elves.”

Remus scoffed, but pressed closer to Sirius’ side, “You wish, Black.”


	11. On the eleventh day of Christmas...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wolfstar is broken up and see each other at a Christmas party.

Sirius would be lying to himself if he said Remus wasn’t the very first thing he saw when he walked in to James and Lily’s apartment. Peter started commenting on the lights and the tree in the corner. Sirius faintly heard Lily’s reply, but he was already scanning the room for sandy blonde hair, for hazel eyes and pinkish scars. He found those eyes almost as quickly as they found him. Remus was standing across the room. He was talking to a slightly shorter boy whose back was towards Sirius. He was dark haired and sported a rather worn out jacket. Sirius glanced down at his own leather one. Remus stopped mid-sentence when his eyes found Sirius’, making his companion wave a hand in front of his face. The gesture caused Remus to flinch in surprise, and Sirius felt his hands form fists at his sides, annoyed by the stranger.

“Sirius.” Lily touched his shoulder, “ _Sirius_.”

He blinked, looking down at her, “Sorry.”

Lily shook her head, eyes worried as she looked behind her at where James was drawing Peter into a conversation with Marlene and Alice. She took his arm, looping their elbows together, and pulled him away towards the quieter drink table.

“Lils, what’s going on? Are you okay?”

Lily nodded, “Yes. Yeah, fine, I…” She worried her lip, tugging at a light up Christmas necklace around her neck.

Sirius studied her face, “Is… James…?”

“No. No, it isn’t us. Sirius…” She let out another long breath, “Sirius…”

Sirius let out a breathy laugh, not sure what else to do, “Lils, I’m not really sure—“

“He’s here with someone.”

The shorter boy in the leather jacket. Snapping his fingers in Remus’ face.

Remus’ eyes meeting his. A split second of contact for the first time in months.

Sirius tried to compose his expression, but it was already falling.

He swallowed, again, a third time, trying to rid his mouth of the cotton that had replaced his tongue. He cleared his throat, “Right. Is he now. Right.” His throat felt raw as he sucked in air, his chest ached, “Right. Okay.”

Lily pressed a hand to his arm, eyes sad, “I didn’t want—I wanted to be careful about how you found out, just in case it was… Fuck, Sirius, I’m…”  
“No, I’m fine.” Sirius nodded too willingly at her, swallowing thickly again and shaking his head, “I’m fine, really. Thanks for…” He trailed off and Lily nodded in understanding. He gave her hand a slight squeeze, “We should, y’know.” He jerked his head towards the room, “People will think somethings up.”

“Right.” Sirius caught the waver in Lily’s voice, “Yeah, okay. Do you want a drink?” She reached for a bottle and, suddenly, Sirius choked. He couldn’t imagine standing there, right now, drinking some Christmas punch while Remus was two feet away, standing beside some fuck with no idea how lucky he was. Sirius put out a hand to stop her.

“No. No, thanks.” He pressed his lips together, shoving his hands into his pockets and dropped his eyes to his shoes, “Lils, I think I actually might just…”

“Oh, Sirius, no… No, please don’t leave. I didn’t want this to—“ She cursed under her breath, leaning her hip against the table, “Well. I mean, I can’t say I don’t understand.”

Sirius nodded, not quite able to meet her eye. Whether it was guilt for leaving, or the fact that there was an ever building sting behind them he didn’t know.

Lily picked up the bottle anyway, pouring some more red wine into her glass, “Would it help if I told you, in all truth, that he’s a right _arse_.”

Sirius couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled up, watery or not. He shook his head, feeling it in his chest, the tears, “Not really. Lils, I really should…”

Lily bit her lip, “Right. Okay. I’ll walk away and you can just…” He nodded, finally meeting her eye. Lily sighed, “We love you, Sirius, okay? Come back tomorrow?”

Sirius nodded.

“Or the next day.”

Sirius sent her a soft smile, and she pressed her hand into his one more time before turning and walking to James who instantly wrapped her into his side without breaking the story he was telling. Sirius took a breath. He forced himself not to look in Remus’ direction. He didn’t want to see, he didn’t want that image any more burned into his mind than it already was. Instead, he turned on his heel, and he went, shutting the door, the party, the music, Remus, out behind him.

He walked down the stairs, carefully avoiding the piles of slush, and out onto the street. He walked through the snow, and he could hear the party, muted through the walls and windows.

He looked up to the window, the soft yellow light, and, just maybe, thought he saw a palm pressed to the frosted window, breath fogging up the glass, and hazel eyes staring down at him.


	12. On the twelfth day of Christmas...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sirius and Remus meet in a pizza parlor.

“One deep dish pizza.”

Remus’ head jerked up from where it had rested, face down, on his folded elbows. There was a waiter standing over him in the dim light of the restaurant. He had thick, dark hair that curled around the antlers he was wearing, and a pin on his apron that read, _May your days be cheesy and bright_. Remus blinked up at him.

“What?”

The boy raised an eyebrow at him, “Your pizza.” When Remus still didn’t say anything he pushed it forward a little, “It’s a deep dish pizza.”

Remus looked down at the steaming meal, then back up at the boy. The name _Sirius_ was embroidered over the cheesy pin. Remus thought it was a bit of an odd name. Maybe it was the name of the restaurant he was in, he couldn’t quite remember. Although, it was an odd name for a pizza restaurant too.

“I…Oh. I didn’t order a pizza.”

The boy—Sirius, possibly—cleared his throat, “Yeah. But you… you looked like you might, y’know,” He shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans, “need one.”

Remus shifted, “I look like I need a pizza?”

Sirius sighed, “You’re sitting her in a practically empty pizza place on Christmas Eve. It’s negative one degrees out and you walked in here with nothing but that sweater on and you’ve been sitting here with your head down for the past ten minutes.” Sirius shrugged, “Yeah, you need a pizza, in my opinion.”

Remus opened and closed his mouth a few times, “I…” Remus felt a flush start at his neck, “Thank you, but I can’t pay for it.” He pushed the menu away from him nervously. The top said _Pizza Corner_. So, Sirius was his name, “I don’t have any money—“

“Who said you had to—“

“I did.” Remus cut him off, looking back up at the boy, “I’m not taking free pizza from you.”

Sirius hesitated, hovering over the table. Remus wondered if he would shrug again and take the pizza back. Then he wondered if he would insist. He wasn’t sure which one he preferred. Then, Sirius let out a breath, took his antlers off, and slid into the booth opposite Remus. He picked up a slice of pizza, “Well, I’ll eat it then.”

Remus blinked, sitting up straighter, voice lost as Sirius started munching on the first slice. He nodded towards the pizza, “You can still have some, if you want.”

Remus looked at the pizza. Cheese was falling in strings onto the pan from the thick crust. The pepperoni looked spicy, the outer crust crunchy. His stomach growled painfully. He turned away.

Sirius produced two cans of ginger-ale from somewhere within his apron and slid on discreetly towards Remus, “What’s your name and why won’t you share my pizza?”

Remus scoffed, “You know why I won’t share your pizza.”

Sirius folded a second slice and took a bite, “But it’s sharing now!”

“ _Sirius_ —“

“Ah,” Sirius pointed his pizza at him, “You know my name, I should know yours.”

Remus pressed his lips together at his slip. He hadn’t mean to say it but…it was nice. It was a nice name, he decided. “Remus.”

“Remus.” Sirius nodded, like he was testing it out. Remus felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up, and goosebumps rise pleasantly. Then he pushed the tray towards him, “Remus, have a slice of pizza.”

“Jesus Christ.” Remus sighed and sat back in the booth.

Sirius just looked at him, eyes soft. Remus looked back for a moment, until he realized he’d started to _admire_ rather than just look, and to wonder of Sirius was doing the same. He looked away.

“I don’t know what you think I’m trying to do, Remus.” Again, Remus fought the urge to shiver at Sirius’ voice, “I don’t know you, you don’t know me, I get it. But…” Sirius set his slice down on the tray and folded his arms on the table, “But, mate, I can see every notch in your spine through that sweater of yours and it isn’t the thickest thing in the world but it isn’t the thinnest either.” Sirius bit his lip, “Certainly not thick enough for weather like this.”

Remus looked down at his hands. They were red and raw from the wind. He hid them beneath his thighs and blinked hard.

“I don’t know your story,” Sirius’ voice was soft and calming, like he could sense Remus’ fight with himself, “but I recognize it. Just a little. I’ve lived it, maybe, or something like it and…” Sirius broke off, maybe regarding Remus or, maybe, maybe, admiring, “It’s just a pizza. It’s Christmas.”

Remus let out a shaky breathe, trying to calm his heart beat down. He felt frozen, and weak, and unbearably thankful. Who was he, to receive this? Slowly, without looking up, he reached forward and picked up a slice.

He heard Sirius let out a breath, “Okay. Good. Alright.”

Remus looked up as he took a bite and met Sirius’ eyes. He smiled, Instantly, Remus felt warmer. He told himself it was just the food entering his system for the first time in he wasn’t sure how long.

Sirius picked up his own slice and they ate in silence for a few minutes, Sirius cracking Remus’ ginger-ale open for him and sliding it the rest of the way across the table.

“So,” Sirius broke the silence when he reached his third slice, “Do you have a place to stay?”

Remus looked up, swallowed thickly, “Don’t push it. I’m eating your damn pizza.”

Sirius raised an eyebrow, “Yeah, I’ve gotten this far, I damn well am gonna push it.”

Remus rolled his eyes, “ _Yes_. I do.”

Sirius just looked at him, chewing slowly.

Remus sighed, “No. I mean.” Remus took another bite, “Yeah, no. No.”

“Well, I do.”

“Good on you.” Remus grumbled.

“ _So_.” Sirius pressed on, “So, you do too.”

“ _No_. What? No—“

“Why?” Sirius waved his arm and a piece of pepperoni went flying to the floor by the opposite booth. He looked at it for a second before continuing, “I live, like, five minutes away, there’s more than enough room—“

“This isn’t about room. This is—“ Remus was going to say that it was about the fact that he didn’t _know_ Sirius, but, he found that that wasn’t what was stopping him. “This is about the fact that I, I can’t give you anything in return.”

Sirius dropped his crust onto the tray, “Did I say I was looking for payment?”

They stared at each other. Remus felt a flush creep up his neck and bit into his lip. His eyes flickered down then back to Sirius’ face, “You don’t eat the crust.”

Surprise flickered in Sirius’ eyes but his face remained strong, “No. I don’t.”

Remus kept his glare in tack, “It’s the best part.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” Sirius stood, “As long as you keep in mind that it’s negative one degrees. Now,” Sirius untied his apron, and picked up his antlers, “I’m going to put these away. Then, I’m going to grab my coat, and go wait by the door. Okay?”

Remus looked stubbornly ahead of him, “You’ll be wasting your time.”

“Negative one degrees!” Sirius called over his shoulder.

And suddenly, Remus was alone again in the booth. He watched from the corner of his eyes as Sirius hung his apron up, making smalltalk with the chef. He seemed to be doing things in slow motion. He took his time folding his things, even straightening his stupid pin. Remus sat, rigid. His chest felt four times smaller than usual, filled with a strange mixture of guilt and want. This boy, Sirius, whoever he was, was warm. Remus closed his eyes. He was warm and kind. Remus had forgotten what warm and kind felt like, and now it was right in front of him. Right in front of him and about to walk out the door.

No, about to _wait_ by the door.

Patient.

Warm, kind, and patient.

It made Remus want to cry, and smile, and let go, all at once.

Remus jumped, head whipping behind him as the bell above the door rang. He just caught a head of dark hair walking out into the darkness before the door closed and his own face was reflected back at him. He blinked at the expression on his face.

He looked terrified.

Remus turned around quickly, shrinking into the booth and breathing hard. Not so patient then. Not so kind, not so warm. God, he felt stupid. He was stupid. Pizza was one thing. Remus pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes. Sirius didn’t want him to stay. Sirius didn’t know him. Remus shook his head to himself. He was stupid. He was stupid.

The bell jingled again.

“Hey, sweater-boy.”

Remus looked up, spinning in his seat. His heart clenched.

Sirius was there, in the open doorway. His nose was pink from the cold and a hat was pulled low over his head. He wore a sweatshirt, and held what looked like a thick winter coat in his arms. Remus breathed out, shaking, relieved.

Sirius jerked his head towards the outside and grinned, “Coming? Car’s warmed up.”

Remus didn’t hesitate this time. He didn’t even think to. He got up, he smiled back, and he went.


End file.
